If I Die I Die

I don't understand the mentality of the people I know. They want to stay "safe" in their small little bubble of a life. Every time I travel I get a talking to from my grandmother that simply goes "you're going to die if you go on this trip..." and I always respond with a "if I die, I die..." which she absolutely cringes to when I say it, but it's true. I've been putting in for new jobs lately that would help me achieve a better quality of life, and all I hear are the same old things. "you're going to die", "you're going to loose your retirement", "well we can't help you up there". first off I'm more scared of an unlived life than I am of dying. Second, retirement based with nothing is still nothing to me. Third, everyone needs help sometimes but I'm a pretty independent person, if I need that much help I'll come home with my tail tucked between my legs and we'll never speak of it again...

It just kills me to hear every one I know say their going to stay in a shitty position just for retirement. it doesn't make much since to me for someone to work the the good years of their life away so they can enjoy the last few years of "good health". Personally I'd rather enjoy the whole time. why work so hard for that few years??? The one thing we'll never ever get back is time, and I personally feel like I'm wasting mine at a dead end job.

Death, just because it's a mystery to everyone doesn't mean its a bad thing, and what could possibly kill me every time I go on a damn trip, I mean if there were hordes of raving knife wielding lunatics, poisonous pit vipers, and meteors raining from the sky, then yes I would take death a little more seriously, although freak accidents happen I'll cross that bridge with I get to it.

Failure really doesn't frighten me. I'm actually way more scared of success, I mean what if I can't handle it? now that's scary. When you're at the bottom what have you got to loose, I'm a slave to no one but the power company at the moment. Being a failure is easy, I mean hell someone will take care of you, this is America where they won't let you fall too far.

All I can say is Live for the moment because yesterday is dead and gone and tomorrow doesn't officially exist yet.