Paul McCartney

The best kind of weekend is the kind you have in the middle of the week...

So some time back Lee invited me to go with her to see Paul McCartney in concert. To be honest I was as giddy as a big harry school girl ever since she ask me to go, and it got worse at the concert got closer. Tuesday was the night of the concert.

I ended up taking a half day off from work on Tuesday. Went hope though I would clean up a bit, I'm texting my buddy's baby momma asking her what a guy should wear to a Paul McCartney concert. She's a pretty fashionable lady so I took her advise. spent the next couple hours getting my groom on trying to look my best.

I roll down the interstate toward her house, getting my Al Green / Instrumental Wu Tang cover band on. I get to her place and I've got this little present for her wrapped in brown paper with a green bow wrapped around it looking a lot like a pretty Chinese take out box, it contained mustard even though everyone I know said "please don't give her mustard...". I also gave her a six pack of copper ale. I mean for god sake flowers are so over rated, everyone gives flowers but you give a girl a bottle of mustard and that's going to live on forever good or bad she'll never forget. So she opens her little take out box and seems to enjoy the fact that she receives mustard. Then she looks at me and ask "would you like a beer?" I'm thinking "damn did I hear her correctly? Would I like a beer" and I respond with a "yes, I would love a beer." it kind of caught me off guard because I've never had a girl ask me if I wanted to start my night off with a beer. so we had a beer together and roll toward the concert.

We get to the parking garage and it's my job to remember where we parked. I might appear useless at a lot of things but I'm damn good at finding my way back to places intoxicated, I'm also really damn good at splitting up the bill for groceries with my buddies at Wal-mart but that's a whole different story. Lee tells me about this pre-party that's suppose to be happening up the street so we walk to that and it's ending by the time we get there so we hit up a bar, after we hopped some plants to get in. We roll in and and she wants me to recommend her a drink, and I'm sitting there like a damn stooge because I really hadn't even considered drinking at this point even though we were in a bar... So I say "Cape Cod" and she ask me what it is and I tell her it's a vodka cranberry with a touch of lime (nice quick drink highly recommended if you're a fan of any of those products), and I'm thinking for myself a Gin Ricky (Gin, lime juice, and soda water). I order for Lee and myself and the bartender doesn't know what a Gin Ricky is, so I tell him and I forgot to say soda water. so I'm drinking straight Gin with a splash of lime juice, also a great way to get more bang for your buck, I'm drinking basically three shots for six bucks... Well needless to say I was getting simi-hammered simi-fast. We have a couple drinks and roll out heading towards the concert.

We're at the gates showing our tickets to people and we're asking how to get to our seats, and this lady tells us "take the escalator and then take the small escalator and you're there" and we're like "thank you" (said drunkenly) and we start to look around and there are like four different sizes of escalator, and it's like what the hell. But we finely figure out where we're going with no help from this guy. there is a bar fairly close to our seats and we sit down and I get to tell another bartender how to make a Gin Ricky again forgetting the soda water, guzzle that and take a blue moon to our seats. So we're following this lady to show us where our seats are and I'm looking down the steps and they are looking extra steep and I'm feeling extra tipsy thanks to the half bottle of Gin I have consumed, and I'm trying to balance while drinking my beer trying to squeeze between the people standing to let us get to our seats, also I might have spilled a drip or maybe a slosh of beer on this dudes head in front of us, but I kept moving and didn't look back... I was sitting there kind of looking at Lee and I saw how much her eyes lit up and I loved it, I never see anyone excited about anything any more and that was so refreshing to me, I might have been drunk but I can still notice things.

So the concert has already started and we're about five songs in and I just happen to realize that I'm about to piss myself, the Gin and beer has caught up with me, and I try to hold it for a minute because I'm thinking "what kind of piece of shit makes everyone get up five songs into a concert..." Soon I have to get up to avoid being the dick that pissed himself at the Paul McCartney concert. Everyone is giving me a dirty look on the way out, then I have to wait in line for the family bathroom, almost didn't make it... I took for sure what was the longest piss of my life I mean I even had time to think about stuff, then I heard Maybe I'm Amazed start playing and I'm cursing and trying to get my zipper up because I love that song. I run out of the family bathroom and get back to my row and the old lady on the end sees me and she has the dirtiest look on her fact and I just mouth to her "I'll sit in front of you until the song is over..." I really didn't want to be the dick that makes everyone miss the favorite part because I drank too much Gin... so I catch the tail end and then make it back to my seat after the song.

I'm a bond fan as most people know, and I'm jonesing for live and let die (I think I'm the only person who says jonesing on a regular basis...) and when it comes on I'm sure I'm sitting there with a big shitty grin, and once it gets to the fast part all these flames and fireworks start shooting out of the stage and I'm about the stroke out, actually I'm still about the stoke out just thinking about it... and then he sing Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood with a ukulele, not gonna lie, I really wasn't expecting that and nearly stoked out once more, one of my favorite songs hands down. Paul also came out for like 3 encores, which was amazing. He really puts on a great show, if you get the chance go see him.

The concert was over and we're both walking around in a state of euphoria and we see this neat old bus parked on the side of the street and there is this girl handing out papers in front of it and getting all curious and stuff, and I ask the girl if we're around to look on the bus, and she says yes, and without hearing another word I just walk on in, and Lee stands outside and ask her what it's all about. Well I'm taking a little tour of the bus and there is this beardy guy sitting in the back eating something I look at him and say "hey buddy that's a nice looking salad you got there" like a dumb shit, and the guy says "yea it's pretty good, their across the street" then Lee is on the bus and she talks to him for a bit, and come to find out it was a damn cult, Lee keeps talking to the dude and I'm starting to get all bewildered, like the motor is running and the girl standing out front of the bus had just gotten on and I start hearing all these loud banging noises and stuff, and I'm about the flip shit because I think we're getting kidnapped by this weird ass cult that want's me to bake bread for some leader type asshole. Lee keeps chatting it up with the guy and he's way too agreeable doesn't matter what she says he all like "yea that's what we stand for" and he's talking about how non-religious their cult is but on their pamphlets they've got all these scriptures referenced, and then he starts talking about how you can't be connected to one another and become better humans by just going to church one hour a week, and I'm thinking the whole time I spend about 40 hours a week with my coworkers and I hate to see most of those people, and I've got the bearded wonder over here trying to talk me into baking bread to make money for the cult, I'll be damned if I'm going to bake bread so some other ass can make a living, If I'm going to be in the cult I'm for sure going to be leading the son of a bitch... So Lee and the guy stop talking and we're making my way off the bus and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't just a little revealed to be off of that jack wagon. I'm really not sure why I was nervous I guess it was my grandmother coming out in me, she's always force fed me that everyone was out to get me from a young age, but I feel like it was true in this case since it was a cult and all we were talking to it is kind of the business of culting to get new members, and I kind of heard Robert Stack in the back of my mind telling my story on unsolved mysteries which would be even weirder since he's dead and all...

We leave the cult bus Lee takes me to this bar where the whole bar top is a fish aquarium and again I'm cheesing like an eight year old, I had never saw anything like that, and I had no idea there was one that close to me, I figured that was the kind of thing you had to see in Korea or someplace. I have to admit to have gold fish swimming under my drink really appealed to me, we ended up getting a few more drinks and chatting it up for a while. Talking about our dreams and such for our lives and how much I'd rather lead a cult than be in one...

We rolled out after a while and it was my time to shine and find the car, and I really didn't disappoint... So we're heading back toward her place, we get to her exit on the interstate, and she says something that I never would have expected "I have Vodka, and triple sec... we should stop and get mixers" and I'm sitting there thinking did I just here her correctly again??? Not gonna lie it was a pleasant surprise to hear someone talking about mixers rather than bed at like 1:30 in the morning. So we stop at Kroger and hit up the juices, and then it hits me Moscow Mule, but of course a Kroger in a city would never have anything like ginger beer, I mean what the hell was I thinking... so we went with cran-apple instead. We get back to her place and I'm bar tender so I'm mixing up everything she has in to one nice little drink. Then she puts a CD in and I'll be damned if it's not Al Fucking Green, I'm a big Al Green fan for the record, I mean there is a select few human beings who can sing about doing the dirty and Jesus in the same song and he's one of them. I'm sitting there and she's talking about how she would like to dance and like a dumb fuck I'm just like "uh huh" I mean why didn't I dance with the girl??? What the hell was I thinking??? We've been chatting and drinking for a good three hours it's pushing 4:30am by this point and we go to the living room to watch some DVRed Saturday Night Live, and Lee is falling asleep during the commercial breaks so we call it a night or maybe a morning depending on your view of the day.

I lay on her couch in my khakis, button down shirt, and old man socks. I end up having this weird ass dream about someone keeping a website about my shortcomings as a human and it was hosted in Germany which was weird as fuck. I wake up at like 7:30am all weird and depressed felling. and I just kind of lay there for a few hours waiting for Lee to wake up, so about 10:30am or so I hear her rustling around and she gets up and makes us a pot of coffee and we chat it up for a little while, we start talking about traveling and then she says "we should go tour a distillery today", again I'm having a moment of damn did I just hear her correctly, and that was cool as fuck, and we keep talking about travel and such and she tells me she has some pictures from her trips to China, Japan, Cambodia, Korea, and some other places. We start going through her pictures which are very cool, most of the things she had in her picks I've never saw or heard of, like snowing in Japan, I mean I didn't even know they received show, hell they not only receive snow that have an all out snow festival (I'm not sure if was japan but it was one of the Asian countries) as well as an ice bar... I was jonesing on all of her pics. Frankly I think she should be a street photographer, she has a really good eye for the interesting and an inquisitive nature to match which is pretty damn cool if you ask me. She showed me her pics from New York as well, lots of art deco and architecture and I love both, it was what I would have assumed chatting with a national geographic photographer would have been like, and I really enjoyed myself.

We didn't actually make it to the distillery tour, but we spent the rest of the evening sitting around outside talking about stuff and junk and such... Not gonna lie it's a good feeling to have a conversation with someone and not get bored these days. I'm pretty sure I'm jonesing on Lee right now, and that's a really weird thing for me to say... Any way like I said the best weekends are the ones in the middle of the week...

An Open Letter To Myself

This is an open letter to myself past, present, and future.

Dear Dude,

It's all irrelevant. I'm not saying this in a negative way, I'm not saying this in a positive way, it's a neutral statement. There aren't such things as failure or success, again irrelevant. The only facts of life occur in the present moment, enjoy this moment, thrive in this moment, take this moment because it's yours to take. Enjoy the small parts of life, their limited. Seek out the catchy little songs, seek out the nights filled with buddies, beer, and brats, seek out life. Breath in the high points, reflect briefly on the low points.

Don't stress anything, It's all irrelevant. Everything you experience is a particular kind of bodily chemical rush, there are no good happenings or bad occurrences, there are just events neither good nor bad. Experience them for what they are. When things appear bad just hold up your head and do your thing, when things look good just hold up your head and do your thing.

Don't over complicate. Sometimes people put too much into nothing, keep it basic, keep it simple, and you'll never go wrong. Don't try to escape your consciousness, observe it, why do you feel the way you do? Why do you think about this and not some other thought? Enjoy the moment and you'll never be unhappy.

Always remember in a million years no one will ever know you existed, so why worry about what anyone things in the moment, enjoy yourself and your moment.

Most importantly, love your dog.




Sincerely,
Largo

Learning, Work, and Life

I'm in an online class right now that I have no interest in what so ever, it's for a generic degree just so I can have a piece of paper with some writing on it that says I wasted half of my life so far just trying to receive. Not going to lie, if I wouldn't have had a full scholarship for the first half and let work pay for the second half I would have been pretty disappointed in myself. Looking back I wish I would have did something I enjoyed rather than listening to everyone around me talk about how I need a degree in what "pays good". I've always heard if you enjoy what you do you'll never work a day in your life, and I believe it to be true. This online class that I'm in is just something I have to have to finish a 12 year degree in nothing. The only reason for this class is to get "unmotivated" students ready for the work place. Personally to be motivated I have to have something to be motivated towards. If I'm interested in something I can work 18 hours non-stop although not healthy, it tells me something, I'm not a lazy guy. I'll work my little heart out for something I'm interested in. If I'm not interested it's lucky if I'll spend 15 minutes. That said, I can't stand this online class, it goes against everything I believe...

There are three types of learners in this world: Visual, Auditory, Kinesthetic. I'm a little touch of all three, but it depends on the circumstance. I think it's funny how an institution of higher education can ignore the very thing they teach. online classes aren't for everyone, especially the ones that only use one form of media, being stacks on top of stacks of paper with no real information. I don't learn this way, give me a video, let me sit down and chat with someone about the subject, let me watch someone work with the subject, don't hand me a stack of papers and say learn.

I wake up every morning and think to myself "there's really nothing that appeals to me about my current life style" I'm up at the ass crack of dawn getting ready for a job that I really have no interest in going too. I really wouldn't mind getting up early if it was something I was interested in getting up for, I mean I'll roll out at 4am just to drive around and take pictures of the moon or something. I think there is a little more to life than sitting at a desk all day, day dreaming about the things you would rather be doing. I don't want to be a bum, and live off the government, I just simply want to do something I enjoy. There is no other animal on the planet that would willing do something it has no interest in doing and keep doing it, so why do humans?

I hear people talking everyday about how they put their dead end job above anything in their personal life, and it makes me so sick. To me work at the moment is something I do to finance the things I actually want to do. I'm really not even sure who I'm trying to convince by even writing this, maybe it's for myself, maybe it's a way to talk myself into becoming something I would like to be. I rally just want to live life on my own terms, I don't want to answer to anyone, not that I really answer to anyone now but I have to give into demands for my time more than I would like.

Our time is the most valuable resource we have and we willing we trade it for something as useless as cash. Cash is fruitless endeavor, cash is everywhere, time on the other hand is priceless, when time is gone time is gone forever, you're done, you're finished...

October Thus Far

So I took Lee Ann out again at the end of September, I ended up meeting with her in the middle and we went to this little Cajan place that had great food and a nice little atmosphere, for sure a place I'd go back too. We were driving back toward the theater, and she looks at me and says "you know what I like about you? the fact that you think the way you do." not gonna lie that kind of made me feel nice. We chit chatted all the way back to the movie theater, and once we got in there watching the previews I honestly felt like we were drunk the way we were going on laughing and giggling and stuff. In honor of the 30th anniversary of Ghost Busters they we're playing it there and that's what we watched, I was giddy to say the least. I personally can't wait until jaws comes back for the 40th anniversary, if it happens. So I'm sitting in the movie just really on the edge of my seat wanting to make a move, and I notice her moving around in her seat a little and I through my arm up and she give me an odd look so I put it back down, I wasn't sure if she didn't know what I was trying to do or it just weirder her out but I decided to pull back lol. I did end up holding her hand for a bit though, and I really enjoyed that. Fuck listen to me sounded like a damn 14 year old over here, what happen to me??? Then again it's kind of nice to feel something for a girl again, it's been way too long since I've had any of these feelings. It feels nice to roll in somewhere and not be able to figure out exactly how the nights going to end. I've been dealing with too many little college girls the last few years, I'm not use to a woman any more... So we roll out of the theater and I take her back to her car, I end up give her a nice tight hug and tell her to be careful on her way home and to text me when she got there. I drive home and as soon as I get there I get a text from her tell me she got caught in traffic, and we end up chatting it up half the night until I pass out.

Then there was Homecoming... now that was an experience. My dad ends up hanging out with us, he's really doesn't party, it's more like a mascot for our tailgate site because all the students know him from campus. We actually have a pretty damn good set up this year, a Coleman stove with hot chocolate on one side and taco soup on the other, and of course we spiked the hot chocolate with caramel vodka, it was a winner. The wind was blowing 80 miles an hour and it was like 30 degrees already but I wouldn't miss it for the world. We end up back at the house and getting ready for the "after party" taking our post tailgate poops and showers and all. Well we ended up driving out to one of the hotels in town and meeting up with a bunch of girls we use to know about 10 years ago, I had a different impression of them back then thought they were good girls, because I didn't know any better, when we roll in the room two of them are fucked out of the gourds after taking something I'd never heard of. I know nothing about that kind of stuff and I steer clear I'm a booze hound not a druggie, so we ended up leaving the room with one of the other girls who was a booze hound too, and we make the half a mile trek across intersections and traffic to the one bar this town has which happens to be something of a honkey-tonk, it's a little on the white trash side but I wouldn't change a thing. I see a ton of what are mostly girls that I use to know, we get our hugs and stuff out of the way and chat it up about how much nothing has changed in this town. well many shots and mixed drinks later me and my buddy roll out at 11:30, the bar closes at 12, yes 12... so we're gonna get back to the hotel and pick up our stuff and call a taxi. well I meet him in the car and the dude is passed out so I'm thinking let him sleep it off for a minute call a taxi and we'll finish up the night right.

12:30am - calling taxi, "hey can we get picked up at the days inn?"....... "sure, be right there"

1am - "where's that taxi?"

1:30am - "so about that taxi at 12:30... it never came" "oh I'm so sorry we'll be right here"

2am - "where the fuck is that taxi, dude turn the car on" "(no real language spoken)" car doesn't get started

3am - no taxi ever shows up. again... "dude start the car it's cold in here"  "(no real language spoken)" but he does reach for the keys this time...

4am - "fuck dude, it's freezing in here why didn't you tell me to start the car?" " I did dude..."

4:05am - "where are my keys?"

4:05am - 4:50am - car is torn apart and people in the room have 50 voice mails

4:50am - Scooby Doo Mystery solving begins "dude, you had the keys, you were sitting in the car when I got here, then you had to reach over and unlock my door, and I had to unlock the one in the back, and no one just leaves one door unlocked in this time of electrical locks and such..." then I said "dude, your wallet was in the floor board, your phone was in the floor board, I bet your keys are there too... look harder!"

4:52am - Keys are located way up under the seat under Mc Donalds fries from two years ago...

5am - teeth chattering stops and we roll back to my place and I'm down for the count.


Not the most eventful homecoming but one for the books non-the-less. But October has been pretty fun so far, now I need to think of a Halloween costume, If Lee Ann and myself do something I'd really like to do Fred and Wilma Flintstone, because I'm built like Fred and she has a little touch of Wilma in her, but time will tell.